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There are things that happen to us, all thru our lives, that we find ourselves still trying to reckon with years after the fact.
They could be matters of romance, family, friendship or work.
I'm talking mainly about the sad, frightening, disappointing occurences that can come from seemingly nowhere and leave us bitter, confused, less willing to flay open our chests and show our beating hearts.
The good things seem to take care of themselves, giving us a sense of wellbeing and increased confidence that everything might not be so bad after all.
When we're younger and feel we have all the time in the world to play with, we tend to shake off the bad experiences like a horse does flies.
At least temporarily.
As the years go by, we become more aware of which of these we have naturally and successfully gotten out of our systems and which ones have been lying dormant, waiting for us to address them.
These are issues we're forced to face later because we couldn't handle them back when we decided to put them in cold storage.
It could have just been a simple matter of wanting to get on with life while it was all staring us right in the face and we had all we could do to focus on whatever came next.
Cuts, bruises and setbacks be damned.
Later on, some of the unresolved episodes become too cumbersome to drag with us any further.
We can let some of them go like so much excess baggage, revelling in the relief of the burden.
We can also admit that a number of these things are not going to pass, if they haven't by now.
That's when we must find a place inside ourselves to let them live.
Logically, it's better to ackowledge their existence and have a hand in their care and upkeep.
At that point, it's all rationale and damage control anyway.
A steady dull ache that we can learn to live with is preferable to sudden, sharp, scary pains that shake us to the core and make us doubt our ability To carry on.
Best to treat it like an old wound that, apparently, is never going to totally heal.
You'll have days when you hardly know it's there and days when it will be all you can think about.
It's part of you.
Change the dressing and bandage when the need arises and go on about your business.
And be grateful that at least you know, after all this time, it probably won't kill you. ~


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